Manila Malta

 I woke this morning at 5am after a 10 hour sleep. I stuffed around for 3 hours on YouTube and Facebook. Amazing how much time you can burn away. I headed out around 8 towards the scooter rental.  On the way I bought a lamb wrap, which was a chicko roll full of lamb, and it was fantastic. The weather report wasn't good for today and the scooter rental place was shut due to the rain. I walked down towards the water and it was honestly as nice a day as you could imagine.

I had a look on maps and I was about 30 metres from another scooter place. It was called Bodgy Barry's mad scooter emporium and dead cat disposal or something similar. Naturally I hired a scooter from him. He asked if I'd ridden a 125 before. I said yes. He asked if it was a long time ago, I said yes, but I ride a 900 at home. I was feeling pretty smug. That satisfied him. Then I took off and nearly stacked it straight away.

This bike is something else. You have to get it up to about 7000 revs before it starts moving. The front brake is pretty close to nonexistant, the rear brake is super glue. I'd say that is by design. I had a look at the front tyre and have never seen a tyre so degraded, and I've had tyres that have warped because the mesh inside has rusted away. This one is worse, with a crack running rhw circumference so it is like 2 front tyres. The rear tyre is merely bald. It does, however, get me to different places.

If you look closely there are seagulls in the background looking to pop on this bike (that's actually the tip). 


I rode up and down the promenade because the bike was on empty when I picked it up and there was supposed to be a petrol station. I eventually found it and filled up. It was 7 euros. Unfortunately the check engine and oil pressure light remained on, even with a full tank. I tried to leave the city and ended up on a highway (which isnt actually much in Malta), so I got off it after about 400 metres, followed the road around and ended up on the same bloody highway back the other way. I then decided to follow the coast, that way I couldn't get lost. I did this and went through some really nice areas, eventually leaving the city. I got stuck behind a garbage truck so pulled off the highway down a side road beside the water. I took a photo of the bike there. The tip is in the background, where the bike is destined. I should point out I actually have no problem with the bike. It hasn't wronged me, it's just shit is all.

After that I rode in random directions and ended up spotting a big fortress thing. I made my way up there and it was Mdina, the "silent city". It used to be the capital of Malta, but the Knights Hospitallier took over and shifted the capital. That might not be true. I googled the place and it apparently has a population of 93. There were a few thousand people wandering the streets and they weren't silent. Apparently at night when the visitors leave it is eerie, because it actually does become silent.

The town outside the fortress thing was quite nice to walk around. I did see 2 old ladies in a shop abusing the shit out of the lady serving. Like, really getting stuck in. I thought I might be a robbery or something. I don't get involved in old lady politics (except at work), so I moved along.

Inside the fortress there is a whole other town. I suspect it is a bit like how Venice or Mont St Michel or Timbertown is a town. They exist solely for tourists. But it was quite a impressive structure regardless. And it did look like there were genuine houses in there.

I thought I took more photos on my phone. 

That is it from the point of view of the people receiving the cannon fire. 

In 1565 there was a Siege of Malta, and the Mdina fortress or whatever it is actually called was going to be taken by the Ottomans as they needed somewhere to spend the winter. It was poorly defended and easy pickings. The few soldiers began firing upon the Ottomans ridiculously early, with their few cannonballs, way before they were in range and in ways that would never possibly cause any harm. This convinced the Ottomans that the Maltese defenders had an abundance of ammunition and they called off the attack. If that is REALLY what happened, it is genius. From what I've read, everyone thinks the Maltese did that on purpose as a subterfuge... I'm VERY skeptical.

After that I made my way towards the Dingli cliffs. I rode the wrong direction often but eventually made it there. The cliffs were probably nice. As far as I can tell, you get to the top of a hill, then you walk down a very intense looking path, then you get to the top of the cliffs. Naturally I'm not walking down hill to get to the top of the cliff, that'd be madness. The view was nice enough I suppose, if you'd never seen the ocean before. The road was great. I followed it for ages. Single lane, no traffic, no idea where I went. Reminded me a bit of the old cycling days.

The cliff actually begins down the bottom on the left. As if I'm going to walk down there!


I'd actually been riding this horror for about 5 hours by this stage, despite only visiting a tip and a fortress and some cliffs that were too far down hill for me. The promised rain looked like it was inbound so I started back to the hostel. It was 19 minutes away. It took me about an hour and a half because I am completely unable to navigate without gps support. I ended up in central Valletta and got overtaken by a bloody horse and carriage! I actually followed it for a long way and this horse was sitting on 30km/h for a long time! It went on the highway and everything. Anyway, I got caught in the rain. I eventually got back to Sliema, where I'm staying, but getting the scooter to the hostel was insane because pretty much every street here is one way.

I'm now at an English pub and it is lovely but really out of place.

I thought I should add, Malta is very nice. The people are so kind and friendly. They stop their cars if it looks like I might want to cross, apologise if I get in their way and are generally really friendly. The ocean is beautiful and the promenades are next level nice. It is the sort of place you come to and thing you could live here, then you think about week 2 living here, then week 3, week 4. It's just too small. I don't know how there isn't more crime out of sheer boredom (like Kempsey).

OK, I'm done. These blogs never used to be so long winded. I think when there is actual interesting stuff to write about, you don't need to write as much.

I found this at the top of a hill, but couldn't get closer as it was fenced off. There was sign that said CCTV in operation. I was skeptical and looked for the cameras. It's in this photo... 

It's on the bloody crusifix! 


OK I'm posting without reading back. The errors will be forever more. Hello mother.