Cairns

Today I went down to the soccer fields and chased some wallabies with the drone. I gave some of the kids a chance to fly it. They lost interest very quickly.

I had an awkward moment when the kids noticed a horse was doing a poo. I looked over and realised it was a male horse just chilling, maybe showing off a bit, not pooing. The kids kept watching and I heard them start saying "it's not snapping off". I walked quicker to no avail and they soon realised that it wasn't a poo coming out of the middle of the horse. They whispered and giggled. Then the birthday girl  Jess, started saying "Ben, that horse has..."

I switched to teacher mode and said "Don't you mention that horse, I don't want to know, I don't care and it isn't appropriate". It had a massive willy though and it definitely didn't snap off.

Later we went to the beach for the birthday party. I helped Mick cook the snags. There were about 20 kids and some of their parents. One of the parents came over and told us that the other parents thought that Mick and I were an ex gay couple. I think I was the step father of one of the children in this scenario.

Mick was horrified. I thought it was hilarious. Mick started blowing up about it so I touched his arm tenderly and said "Darling, don't be like that". I'm leaving in a day or two but he's here forever. Mick is the blokiest bloke but after we were pronounced gay I noticed he had anchors all over his shorts so I reckon it is his fault.

After that we came back to the house and the kids went back to pat the horses. They're about a block away. When they came back they were one child short so we all ran out to find the missing kid. She turned up down near the paddock.

Now it is bed time.